"look how many albums i have lilstened to this year, i bet YOU havent heard these albums.......but I have."
These lists, unless written for smash hits, are usually full of nu wave or low wave or high flange grunge or whatever it is that happens to be flavour of the month(or year) for post grad art students/NME editors/Douche bags.
They arent what they claim to be, which is a list of great albums released in 1 calander year. If that was the case Beyonce wouldnt be 20 places higher than White Denim and PJ Harvey in Rolling Stones list....and Superheavy (the abortion project by Mick Jagger, Joss Stone et al) wouldnt be in it at all.
These lists are just an easy way to end the year for editors of music mags everywhere, an ego stroking device for music snobs and a way music labels can peddle there shit just before christmas.
Now I aint a post grad anything, nor am I a writer or editor for NME. I am one hell of a douche bag though, and with that I give you a pretentious list of albums you probably havent heard, but I have.
The worthy members of such an elite list will follow, but for now lets take a quick look at the musical landscape that was 2011.
It started off badly, as you might expect. Matt Cardle was number 1 in the singles chart. Remember him? (Remember the singles chart?) I have only just found out this person exists. He won X-Factor.
Take That were number 1 in the album charts only to be replaced 1 week into the year by Rhiannas album "loud"
Adeles second album was released a month or two later and is still number one.....it probably is somewhere anyway.
And whenever she wasnt number one, the top spot was filled by the likes of GaGa, Bouble and other idiots.
Away from, the top spot, Elbow released an album at some stage. I cant remember it doing any good. They suffered the same way Snow Patrol did. A band who didnt get much attention during there early career, gained massive critical and public praise for 1 particular album and then slowly faded away into every starbucks playlist this side of costa coffee.
Radoheads album was good. It was called King Of Limbs if i remember rightly. I enjoyed listening to it for free on youtube.
I cant remember if this was the album thom York let people have for free, or bid on like an auction, or exchange nails and hair for a copy........however they decided to flog it, i didnt buy it. so i guess it doesnt make the list.
Or maybe it does....who knows. Not even me. So how would you know. shut up.
REM released what was to be there last album - the universe didnt seem to notice.
Kings Of Leon also continued to butcher what was a great body of work when they released an album in march? Or february? I cant even remember what it was called but in one of there videos they were tryin to be some sort of white Jesus.
Away from stadium rock, somehow old school trance music made its way into hip-hop, killing the genre forever.
SOmeone else who tried to kill off hip-hop was Pink. Oh sorry, I mean "P!nk". She had a greatest hits out. Oh sorry, "Greatest Hits....So Far".
Gaga, Beyonce, Katy Perry, Jessie J, Rhianna, JLo, Britney spears and probably many many more female solo artists had stuff in the charts.
But no females in the shortlist for sports personality. Unlucky girls.
Saying that, pj harvey seems to be getting alot of plaudits for her album, let england shake. it is pretty good actually. but is it that good? i dunno, not listened to it for a while. is it as good as black keys? not for me. does that mean it aint worthy of being included? fuck knows.
Now, there is alot of soft 80's style stuff comin out of america at the minute and I cant really get on board with it. Stuff like The Antlers just doesnt float my boat. They are in all the other lists, but not mine.
Its difficult making this list while listening to Ted Nugent. Ted Nugent! So badass.
Miles Kanes album was a bit of a stinker if you ask me....It was alright but no more than that. If you own it, when did you last listen to it? And be honest. Months ago wasnt it. Cos it aint all that. A bit like The Arctic Monkeys album, grew on me for weeks but never quite made it into the realms of "this is a good album". It only just got passed "meh, its ok" before stalling and settling at "its ok, got a few great tunes.....cant remember what theyre called".
The Submarine OST however.....pretty great. 6 songs long, and theyre all great. and the version of piledriver waltz is better than the version that apeared on suck it and see.
(I wrote this about a week ago and I am just re-reading it for the first time before posting it. Since I wrote this I have actually listened to Suck It And see again, and its actually pretty decent boardering on the sublime. See what time does?)
Kasabians album was dreadful in my opinion. 4 albums in, 2 great, 2 poor. thats how I see it. Still a great band live, but on record they can really really piss me off.
Was the Strokes album any good? I think i listened to it once and then decided Julian Casablancas should just go solo and let the others do somethin else. Would benefit everyone.
The Vaccines are meant to be good. aint bothered with em.
The Foo Fighters had an album out....
so did Bjork
Florence and The Machine
Kate bloody Bush
The Horrors album is meant to be really good, and I heard some off it and I really liked it. Not listened to the album in full though, so Horrors fans, your boys aint on the list.
Jayz and Kanye had an album out. Eminem did to. Dr Dre.........didnt, which suprised no one.
Coldplay had an album out. I havent heard any of it. Is it any good?
St Vincent has been raved about by everyone, and i think its garbage. maybe i shouldnt do a music blog cos i clearly hate music.
ergh, what next. Bon Iver. Is it any good? Well, I cant get into it. So no, not on the list.
The Strange Boys had a great album out only the other month called "Live Music". i have heard it described as Exile On main St performed by a bunch of hoodies.
It is a good album, but I dunno, should it be in my list? What hoodies do they wear? Nike or Adidas? If its Fila or Elisse then they are in the list.
Amy Whinehouse died at some point this year, which was a genuine loss to music. She was a right div, but she could really fuckin sing.
She will be missed along with Chriostopher Hitchens, Gary Speed, Ryan Dunn, Heavy D, Steve Jobs (who died on my birthday - probably not what he will be remembered for), Macho Man Randy Savage, Elizabeth taylor, Nate Dogg, Smokin Joe, Henry Cooper & Pete Postlethwaite who all passed away this year. Not all of them involved in music, but RIP all the same. RIP everyone.
There was yet more Jagger related garbage. Swagger jagger was an actual song and there was also a maroon5 song about moving like jagger. jagger, as already mentioned, also released an album which was equally dreadful as the 2 songs just mentioned.
WilLIAM Elliot Whitmore had an album out.
So did Janes Addiction.
Glasvegas...
And to top things off, Hard-Fi had an album out this year.
Inbetween all of this there was some music I actually enjoyed released in 2011. Its hardly been a vintage musical year but even when things are so unbeleivably below average, there are always one or two shining becons.
And here they are, in all there glory, the 5-10 albums that managed to poke there heads out from beneath the quagmmire of cowell infested slurry that has been 2011.
The Beets (stay at home & let the poison out)
Anyone who used to watch Nickelodeon about 15-20 years agp should recognise the name but unfortunatly thats about as far as the Doug references go.
Both albums from this year are jam packed with 1-3minute rackets that grab you bby the collar and drag you back to a simpler, cooler time. The dirty garage sound has never sounded so good nearly 50 years since music like this became popular. And a band that draws there own album covers and has Carlito Cool on em must be great.
Black Lips - arabian mountain
I nearly didnt include this but its to much fun and im still listening to it a good 7 months on.
Extra polish has been added to the 'Lips dirty pop in the form of mark Ronson. A grammy award winning producer and a rag tag bunch like the Black lips sounds like an uneven fit but they seem to of worked brilliantly by striking a perfect balance between Ronsons catchy and clean production and the 'lips raw energy and rock'n'roll spirit.
black keys - el camino
Hit me like a ton of briacks when I first heard it. The first 5 songs alone make this a must have and, if it ever needed proving, the black keys have officially claimed the title of best rock outfit out there at the moment. The White Stripes are gone, but the 'Keys will be here for a bit longer we hope
noel gallaghers high flying birds
Yep. Its great. Its effortless. It is Noel Gallagher.
The production can sometimes seem a bit to much. The over use of strings can sometimes grate and having heard a few b-side form the singles its annoying that Noel has once again made mistakes when choosing his tracklist (Lord Shine A Light on me, bar the horrible title, is a stunning song and really should be on the album).
The intro for "death Of You And Me" alone is enough to make up for the albums downfalls, and with the promise of album #2 to be released in a few months, 2012 could be Noels year.
kurt vile - smoke rig for my halo
A hazy, folky trip into the mind of a bloke called Kurt.
This is not an album to put on and expect instant harmony within its 40 odd minute running time. It needs some of your attention and if you give it what it deserves you will be rewarded.
Simply lovely.
war on drugs - Slave Ambiant
The full imagining of last years EP (which made my list last year), Slave Ambiant is a brilliant mix of folk and krautrock that comes off sounding like Bruce Sprinstein meets NEU!
Each song seems to blend into the next that gives the album a certain atmosphere and drive. Even when it starts sounding dangerously close to early U2, its still fantastic.
white denim - D
Not quite in the same league as Black Keys, but pretty chuffin close. Anyone with an ear for blues rock or 1970's Americana will apreciate the layers upon layers of delicious music that shapes each and every song on here.
Wooden Shjips - West
Argubly there best album so far, I think its there 4th? there grooves seem to have more going on in them. They seem to progress more than in past efforts. Ah fuck this, they are the best psychodelic band around. End of.
This is music to get lost in.
The Arctic Monkeys & Alex Turner - Suck It & See & The Submarine OST
Contray to what I said earlier, Suck It And See is actually really good. And so is the Submarine OST. Turner has a knack for writing songs, which is good when your profession is writing songs.
His voice has developed into a wonderful croon rather than a sheffield scally on the piss and his way with words has become more sophisticated, less of the kebab shops and taxis home, more lost loves and soul searching.
On Suck It And See and Submarine he has written some of his best songs, songs that wont make every teenyboppers wet at the crotch, but songs you imagine he has always wanted to write, songs he wont get bored of playing and you wont get bored of listening to.
Dont beleive the hype.
Black Joe Lewis & The Honeybears - Scandalous
Smooth as snake shit and as rock'n'roll as they come. Imagine James Brown jamming with Bo Didley and you are on the right tracks. And if that doesnt sound like something good your a fuckin moron.
The Fleet Foxes album is a worthy mention. Its sophisticated folky shit that sounds bloody wonderful on the perfect day but sometimes like pretentious over stuffed shite - but mainly its good.
Thee Oh Sees latest album, castlemania, is a fantastic summery album with typical west coast vibes you would expect from those lot and PJ Harveys album Let England Shake is really really good, and probably should be on my list but im getting tired now.
The Strange Boys album is also worth a punt.
With that, im off for another month or so unless something comes up.
Hopefully 2012 will be a slightly better year, not just in music, but in everything that makes up our world.
2012 is the last year of the planets existance (according to the "experts"), so before the end lets hope we get a few more classic tunes to soften the blow.
Chow.
Phill Collins is a great guy ! PLEASE Respect him."